O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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