That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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