so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
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