the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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