just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
