If i come over, it means nothing
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize
