Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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