doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
