birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
