then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
