I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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