it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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