she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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