I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I need to calm my uterus...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize