People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
her vagine was all disorganized.
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
My feet surprised me
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