there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
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omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
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SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Couch. On fire.
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