she takes plan B like it's going out of style
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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