Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
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