I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
someone owes me an orgasm
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize