i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
