epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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