she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
