You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
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I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
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Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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