Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize