We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
