Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
