i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
