the new term for farting is butt boxing.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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