Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Everything about him screamed your future.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
