Dual....:-)
fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
