so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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