...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
Im part way to drunk.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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