Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
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