Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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