eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
