You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
