: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
