her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
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