ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Randomize
