i barfeds in our rink
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
