sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
