If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
