I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Randomize
