You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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