I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
