I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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