I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize
