this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
