I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
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I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
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Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
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