She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Welp...herpes.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
