I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
